Monday, 14 June 2010

How do you confuse Emile Heskey? Give him a football

I can't believe Capello's picked Emile Heskey for the World Cup. My initial thoughts were surely he'll be too busy trying to defend his Ladies Singles title at Wimbledon?

But jokes aside: It’s been said a million times over, but I still have no clue as to why on earth Fabio Capello continues to pick Emile Heskey to start up front for England.

He scored 5 goals in this past season. 3 in the Premier League. That’s 3 goals in 31 appearances. Shocking.

I don’t care if he “brings the best out of Rooney” and “is an amazing team player”, strikers are judged on goals - especially when you are in the biggest tournament in the world. Wayne Rooney doesn’t have the most prolific scoring record for England and so in order to balance that, surely we should be looking for more of a “fox in the box” or “poacher” to bang in the goals we seem to be desperately struggling for at the moment?
The most Emile Heskey has ever scored in a single season was 14, back in 2000/2001 at Liverpool.

Peter Crouch has a formidable scoring record for England and surely with a bit of work in training could become Rooney’s “Big man up top”, after all he is the tallest English player in the team and even chipped in with 8 goals this season in the Premier League, when just under half of his appearances were as a substitute.
My personal opinion is that is as dangerous in front of goal as a one legged man in an arse-kicking contest.

Top Tip for England's next game:

If you're watching on Sky+, press "pause" and wait a second before pressing "play". Being a second or two behind the live play will give you that authentic Emile Heskey viewpoint.

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